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7.25.2011

Refine Me

One week before I pack up the Max and head back to the wonderful city of Norman. I cannot believe that the summer has flown by... It seems like just yesterday I was packing up to come home. As I was driving around visiting a few friends, "Desert Song" by Hillsong United came through my speakers. That song represents so many great lessons. The second verse is powerful:

"And this is my prayer in the fire; in weakness, or trial or pain. There is a faith proved of more worth than Gold, so refine me, Lord, through the flame."

Boom. His unfailing love never leaves us nor forsakes us. I think that is a hard principle to grasp, because we think that once we find Jesus we will never experience hardship again. Sometimes we wonder, "Well, God, I'm doing what you have called me to do... So why is all of this happening?" or "I'm doing this for your glory, so why would you stop me from gaining the desires of my heart?" or "Why did this disease strike my family when we have made You the king of our lives?"

It's okay that we ask all of those questions because God knows our hearts, and He knows that we are a hurting people who don't understand what exactly He is doing... but the story doesnt end there. When we experience weakness, or trial or pain, God has abundant opportunity to refine us. We would never grow if we we didn't have to. We aren't a people who like change- We like things to stay the same, we like to be comfortable, we like to be safe.

We live in a dark world, and we weren't created to conform to the patterns of it. There is something significant about living for a God who is bigger than any weakness or trial or pain. We experience those things because we live in a dark place, but we aren't confined to it. We have choices that lie before us- we get to pick if we are stuck. We can't get ourselves out of the junk that we find ourselves in, but we were created by a God who can, and does.

I can't help but wonder how different my attitude and outlook on life would be if I was constantly viewing my life by the words of Verse 2. What if I took every single weakness, and expected God to refine me through that flame. What if we all did? How much more would we grow, give and invest? Our entire way of life would change. It would be a ripple effect, where our hearts are changed because we trust that God knows what He is doing; therefore, we would be sensitive to what He wants us to do for the people around us. How many more people would be moved by the Love of Christ, rather than be burnt by the rules of religion? How many street corners would be free of people screaming through megaphones about the wrath of God, and how many less would go homeless and hungry? I believe a consuming fire would be lit inside of us.

Verse 3:
"And this is my prayer in the battle, when triumph is still on it's way. I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ, so firm on his promise I'll stand."

He promises that he has wonderful and prosperous plans for our lives, yet we aren't convinced. He promises that we are victorious in Christ Jesus and that we have already won the battle because of the cross, yet we can't see the fruit, so instead we see that we have failed. That's so wrong.

As women, I think we find our selves more and more insecure with each generation. We try to fill that void with the uproar of "Women's Rights" and outrageous feminists. Yet, we aren't comfortable in our own skin. We buy billions of dollars worth of magazines and make-up to make ourselves feel better about our features and our body types, which in fact usually makes us feel worse. We alter our bodies to fit what is "beautiful" in the eyes of our culture.

Psalm 139 says, "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made... your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."

Song of Solomon 4:7 says "All beautiful you are, my darling; there is no flaw in you."

Romans 8:17 says, "And since we are His children, we are His heirs; in fact, co-heirs with Christ..."


We are victorious, and we are conquerors. Nothing that satan has up his sleave could ever surprise God, or beat Him. He already won. It is time we stand on His promises, knowing that no weapon formed against us shall prosper (Isaiah 54:17)

We will certainly face hardship. We will fight emotional, physical and mental battles... Satan will do everything in his power to defeat us, but with Jesus we are unstoppable.

Today is a new day; it has never happened before. It might not be easy, but it's worth it. Acknowledge God's promises, and stand firm on them. He gave us His word for a reason; it holds the key to unlock the chains of this world. Run the race. Persevere. Let the Lord refine you through the flames of this life- In Him, You are victorious.

7.08.2011

Fully Alive.

"The glory of God is man fully alive"- St. Irenaeus

With Lindsey's hand in mine, and Cole less than an arms length behind us, we were ready to raid the Red Light District of Cambodia... The scene was alive and carried a heaviness that could not be mistaken by anything but Satan's leash. Men swarmed the streets with rage and lust in their eyes. They were angry, and looking for a quick fix to feed their earthly desires; any woman would do. The women were half dressed; little shorts and low-cut tanks... the look in their eyes told a very different story. A story of deep brokenness, a story that screamed for help. I could feel the beat of the music in my feet as I passed each open bar. To many, it was an invitation; to me, it was a reminder that there were women in that bar pleading for an escape. That was our mission. To create a night of refuge for these women; to give them the escape they needed... even if for just a moment. We snatched them from satan, and introduced them to Jesus; and here began The Night of Refuge.

Three days leading up to the Night of Refuge, Lindsey made her way to the bars of Phnom Pen's Red Light Disctrict. Each day she invested in the same girls of one bar in particular... She would tell them, "We are throwing you a party on Friday night! I am with a group of Americans and we would love to experience Cambodia, so we want you to come party with us on a boat! We are so excited to hang out with you!" Their response would start with a squeal of excitement and lead to, "A party?! Lindsey, that sounds so fun! We can't wait for Friday!" A relationship began to form between Lindsey and these girls. In no time there was a sense of trust; they looked at her as if they knew she would take care of them. It was like they knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that she was different from anyone they had ever encountered... They were attracted to something about her, but they couldn't put their finger on it.

As we walked down the street, we searched for the bar with the girls that Lindsey knew. We knew we had found it when we heard the voices of the sweet women, "Lindsey! Lindsey!" We took 13 women out of that bar that night. Every single girl that was working in that bar came with us; unaware of the dream they were about to enter. We paid ninety-one dollars for thirteen women... seven dollars for each girl... for the entire night. As we told the Mommasons, female pimps, that we were throwing a party on a beautiful boat on the Mekong river their faces lit up. They said, "You don't have to pay for us, but can we come with you?"

We had been praying that we could reach the Mommasons with the message of Jesus.

The night consisted of loud squeals of excitement, endless chatter, silly dance moves and powerful dramas. As the women sat and watched our team present the drama of "Bondage" their walls began to fall, and their chains began to melt. They could easily identify with the girl in the drama who was being controlled by satan. He had a chain around her, tempting her with alcohol, money and men. As she struggles between the temptations and trying to get to Jesus, Satan continues to pull her chain back to him. Eventually she falls at the feet of Jesus and He takes her chain upon himself. He conquers the grave, and shows her that she no longer wears the chains because He took care of her. Now she gets to live in freedom, with Jesus, forever.

The women drank it in like a tall glass of water. They were thirsty of something real, something true. They had been deprived of anything with substance. They had been told their whole lives that it was their duty to sell themselves to make money for their families; but as they saw this drama, Jesus began to wash them of those lies. These women had dreams of becoming something big! They wanted to see the world. They wanted to get married, and to have babies by their husbands. They wanted to make clothes and style hair and apply makeup for other people... Each of them had talents and desires and dreams, the same way I do.

We are all the same. It doesn't matter where we grew up... We might look different, we might speak different languages, we might have different accents or hair colors or even styles of clothing. We might put our selves in categories based on where we go to school, or which neighborhood we grew up in, or even which country we call home... but there is a basic human principle inside of us all. We all dream, we all crave the feeling of love, and we all wish to be desired. It's the way we were created... As we told these women about the Man who wore white in the drama, Jesus, we held their hands and watched their eyes fill up with tears. Every single one of them said, "I hate my job. I hate the bars. I hate the men. I hate what they do to me, but I have a family that I have to support." Whether it was their mom, or their babies, every single one of them felt the responsibility of earning the money to support them. Seven dollars a night. Many of them asked Jesus into their hearts for the very first time; like never before, I saw a little piece of Heaven touch earth.

As we continued to explain to them what they were deciding to do, we told them that they were created to dance in white dresses, and that they are loved so deeply by the creator of the universe. We began to speak life over them, and breathe life into their dreams. We gave them cute notecards that had the numbers of rescue homes that would love to help them convert their dreams to reality.

The Night of Refuge was extravagant, classy, beautiful, pure, life-giving, and peaceful. It was the perfect ending to an incredible journey through the villages and streets of Cambodia... but it was only one little part that created a big picture.

Days before we stepped foot in Phnom Pen, we explored the villages of Kampong Thom. The land was full of beautiful, extraordinary Khmer people. With us were about 5 translators, our contact Sokhon and his wife, Esther. Each day we would wake up and head out to a new village. Outside of our van's windows were precious children, sitting on a tarp, patiently awaiting our arrival. They wore big smiles on their faces, loose clothing, and a joy that was contagious. We played, and face painted, and ran, and danced... We brought little trinkets to give to them to play with- among them were bubbles, hair bows, playdo, smarties...

I remember watching a little boy with a stick of smarties and three of his friends crowding around him... before we could get to his friends to give them their own stick of smarties, the boy was passing them out so that everyone got a few. He noticed as I watched, and offered me one... My heart broke. They have nothing, and they give so freely what is given to them. They care so little about their own well-being, and they would do anything to take care of their friend, or little brother, or mom. They truly embodied the heart of a servant.

The power of prayer is supernatural, and when we tap into the heavenly realm extraordinary things occur. As we prayed of each individual that needed prayer, we saw blind people see... People who had been in too much pain to walk, were dancing through the streets. Miracle after miracle was happening, and their expectation was replaced with awestruck wonder. Some had never heard the name of Jesus, but Jesus certainly knew their names. Now, we will have more Cambodian friends in Heaven... and because of their testimonies of healing, their friends will see the Glory of God.

Each part of the trip played it's part in the journey that the Lord had set before us. I encounted people that I would have never met, had I not been there. The Lord taught me things and opened my eyes that will forever remain with me. I will never forget those little faces that were blowing those bubbles, or the little hands that were hitting the balloons in the air.

I have never been more alive than when I was walking through the streets of the Red Light District, with exceptional women surrounding me. Surely, we saw the glory of God in that moment, and I will forever remember that experience as the one that helped me discover my divine calling in life.

I will be visiting many more Red Light Districts in the future; none of them are safe, in fact they may be some of the most dangerous places on earth. Afterall, we did enter hell for a moment to snatch those girls from Satan's chains. Jesus never said it would be safe, He only said "Go, and I will be your mouth. I will speak for you, and I will never leave you, nor forsake you."

Thank you for supporting me, and investing in the lives of so many Cambodian people. Your support introduced them to Jesus, and radically changed their lives forever. I hope you realize your impact on the world-

"God is not invisible when we come alive." - Jamie Tworkowski